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Help! My Child Has No Interests!

"My child is not interested in ANYTHING!!!" I hear parents complain that their child has no interests fairly often, especially from those with younger children. Hang in there! It's like children learning to ride a bicycle; they use training wheels for so long that you think they'll never learn to ride on their own. Then suddenly - they're off! If you are in the "training wheels" stage, what can you do when your child doesn't seem interested in anything?

I received this question from a fellow homeschooler...

"What if your 13-year-old daughter isn't interested in anything.... or so she says. Loves to read but says she's not interested in reading anything "educational". Seems uninterested in most things the last year or two. Help?"

I got this comment from another fellow homeschooler…

"My 15-year-old seems to have no passion. We have tried a wide realm of activities from art to athletics. We have always stressed the importance of hard work ethic and determination. She seems to be the exact opposite of us.
She does "okay" academically but doesn't seem to have much interest. She is lost in this fantasy world of wanting to be pretty, rich, and married to a baseball player.
I feel like I did something wrong."

What can we do about this??

You might ask, "Why is my child not interested in anything?", and "Am I doing something wrong??" but it's extremely common for kids that age to have no particular interests. Sometimes it seems no matter how much we communicate the importance of activities and schoolwork to some children, sometimes it just takes a while for them to figure it out for themselves. Let them know that though they may not feel motivated to push themselves, doing their best is always a good idea. I have talked to quite a few people who have complained about this problem and then they called me the next year to explain that their child suddenly "caught fire!" There are some things you can do that will help.
First, expose your child to a wide variety of different experiences and subjects. Colleges like to see core subjects covered to make sure kids have caught an area of interest, so make sure you have all the usual subjects covered. Once you have core subjects covered, you can explore! Some cities have "Sports Fairs" where kids can try a sport for a day. Monday is basketball, Tuesday is soccer, Wednesday is baseball, and so on. These fairs (or opportunities like them) can be fantastic resources for your child to try it all, without a year-long commitment. Keep providing opportunities and encouraging your child.
Second, look for an area of interest where you least expect it. I often notice kids have an interest, but neither the student nor the parent recognizes it as a "passion." Instead, they may label it as "annoying" or "just for fun." Here is an article to help you find areas of interest using your own "annoy-O-meter". Use Your Annoy-O-Meter Skillfully. You can also take trips to the library to try new subjects. Watch which books or topics your child naturally gravitates to. Is it history/historical fiction? Science/sci-fi? These natural leanings can help you identify areas of potential passion.
Third, think about passion as something you encourage in your children over four years of high school, not as something they START high school with. Matt Binz, the co-founder of The HomeScholar, has written a series of articles called Raising Your Own Superheroes, all about developing interests in children:

Raising Your Own Superheroes: Step One - Observing Passion
Raising Your Own Superheroes: Step Two - Catching Fire
Raising Your Own Superheroes: Step Three - Providing Opportunity
Finally, when you are considering interests, remember to look outside of academics. Some kids don't love books, but I know they love doing something, and that can be a passion, too! So, if your child loves babysitting, or baseball, or beach combing...one of those things may end up being a passion. Look beyond schoolwork and academics, and at the whole person.
What is your child's interest? Does it seem like your child has no interests right now? Share in the comments!
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Monday, 09 December 2024

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